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| Authors: Jewel Woods, Karen Hunter
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
Category: Book
List Price: $23.99
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Avg. Customer Rating:  15 reviews
Sales Rank: 118659
Media: Hardcover
Number Of Items: 1
Pages: 320
Shipping Weight (lbs): 1
Dimensions (in): 8.4 x 5.4 x 1.3
ISBN: 0446178063
Dewey Decimal Number: 306.7420981
EAN: 9780446178068
ASIN: 0446178063
Publication Date: April 24, 2008
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| Customer Reviews:
 Not too impressed May 19, 2008
9 out of 11 found this review helpful
In an attempt to offer a balanced review of this work, I found myself in a conundrum: Why is it that these men find no fault in their own behavior; and choose to deflect total blame on American black women?
I found the book somewhat cliche in that it offered nothing new that hasn't been written on blogs, in popular magazine and on Youtube. I guess I was looking for more sustenance; instead I found the book rehashing those same rationales: American black women are too goal focused, materialistic, physically unattractive, sexually inhibited and lack the ability to please our men.
Ok... got it.
Not really....
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Quite honestly, sex tourism is not new. Many men (black, White...) have traveled to distant lands in search of some exotic poon that they don't think exists at home. As a matter of fact, a very good friend of mine traveled to Rio several years ago with some friends; and was very candid about the freaky sex, the beautiful women...the freaky sex and of course, the freaky sex. To him, he'd realized very quickly what the game was about. It was about sex. Which, is why, I believe, looking for deeper meaning in this behavior is problematic. Primarily because the motivation seems to be linked to sex.
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It's not the sex that I question. It's the deeper message that people are trying to derive from this. Primarily that it's the fault of American black women, and our inability to be feminine, freaky, intelligent (yet not too intelligent), and live solely for the purpose of pleasing our men. We are supposed to engage in every type of freaky sexual act (or at least not out-right refuse), cook, clean, physically birth children, yet remain as thin, tone and flawless as a nulli-parius 19 year old; and not become too focused on our own careers and ambitions.
When I attempted to summarize this text, I found that it (and many of the anecdotes) was parked at the intersection of narcissism and immaturity. I found that many of the interviewees found that they needed not to be partnered with black women; yet served by black women. Many of the men, not surprisingly, were either divorced, or had several failed relationships. Yet, at no time did any of them cast blame with the "man in the mirror" for the state of their failed relationships with American black women.
I also found it amazingly interesting that many of the interviewees found the sexual freedom of Brazilian women attractive; but degraded American black women who were sexual. Most painful for me to read was the chapter on "Morris-Brown, Clark and Spellman college women", when the barrage of "ho comments" were introduced. I also found it a bit sad when these men openly admitted that American black women exploited the sex-drives of professional black men for money or materialism, yet could not see that "paying to travel to a poor country for sex" was intrinsically, exploitive. In other words, the interviewees were quick to blame their behavior on American black women's lack of ...whatever...; yet couldn't admit that traveling to a poor country for sex with women (many of whom don't even speak the language) was equally or if not worse than any perceived manipulation they faced by American black women.
Another issue (as a public health researcher) that bothered me was the high rates of STDs and HIV in this country. These men spoke candidly about risky sexual behaviors; yet omitted any consequences these behaviors had on their health, the health of their partners (in the US) and the health of the women involved.
Also, it almost comical that many of these men really believed that they were in "exclusive, monogamous relationships"; when it's clear that they will quickly be replaced once the passport expires, and the next group of brothas who paid for the experience, roll down. Yet, for some men, this seems to be more attractive then working on mature relationships with women who are their social and intellectual peers.
I don't know. I really think this whole "Rio-thang" is more about ego-stroking, fantasy and no-frills sex than about some systematic abuse from black women. And not an epidemic among black men.
 Why Blame Anybody? [Leon's Rating: 3.50] May 12, 2008
5 out of 7 found this review helpful
First of all, I would like to say that I was excited to see someone writing a book about this subject. This phenomenon (black men traveling overseas for sex and companionship) isn't really new. This has been going on for years, but people are just now talking about it. There's not very many books about black male sexuality in the African-American book market. And for the few that are out there, most of them do not celebrate black male sexuality, due to the fact that they paint unhealthy pictures (which is quite acceptable in America). Although black men traveling to Brazil for sex and other "good times" is a reality (yet an overrated reality), I can't say that I am really satisfied with the level Jewel Woods has taken it to. For those of you who have yet to read this book, expect nothing more than a Brazilian heterosexual version of "On the Down Low". The only differences is that this book isn't based on Jewel's personal experiences (if he's ever had any) and there's no homosexual behavior involved. This book is mainly based on the interviews/commentaries & observations of a few select men who has traveled to Brazil before (who doesn't represent an entire group of men). I applaud the fact that the author doesn't bore us with scientific data and academic terminologies. However, not only does this man coddle to black women, he makes some unnecessary assumptions based on how a few men feel about black women, women with "extra meat on their bones", men who has been to Brazil those who encourages their friends, sons and neighbors to go, etc...
This book was obviously written for black women. I say this because for one, he starts this book by saying that black men traveling to Brazil is "The New Down Low" (or "Black America's biggest secret"); claiming that this is destroying black women (in regards to their health & psyche) as well as the black family structure. He adds, too, that this is creating a further distance between black men and women. He shares the sentiments of black women who are against this simply by accusing black men of "objectifying" women, being hypersexual and saying these men will never make decent role models for young black men (regardless of class). Similar to J.L. King's "On the Down Low", he dishes out scare tactics and (eight) warning signs that can tell a woman if her black husband/boyfriend is traveling to Brazil for sex. He "warns" black women that if the black men in their lives are learning to speak an alternative language, to be careful, because they could be doing so to woo women overseas in non-English speaking countries. What Jewel Woods (the author) is doing, whether he realizes it or not, is producing even more paranoia and friction in the souls of black women simply by assuming that black men are only educating themselves just to "get away" from black women and get their "freak" on.
Jewel claims that there is no "shortage" of black men and that it's just a myth. I do agree with this. Contrary to public opinion, scientific data and the comments Bill Cosby has publicly made within the past four years, not all black men are dead or in prison. Black women complain that there is a shortage of "good" black men, because the successful, stable ones are spending their time and money on "other things" and "other women" (mainly White and Hispanic women), instead of giving back to the black community. It's very preposterous of him to assume that just because he spoke with a few select black men that they represent every black man who has gone (or plans to go) to Brazil. Black men don't go to Brazil (or anywhere else overseas) just to get away from Black American women or to have sex. A few do so simply to enjoy life, see the world, explore more options and get away from a country that is contaminated with "white supremacy", that prevents certain black men from being successful and most importantly themselves in any setting. Brazil also has some of the most beautiful women, music, land and food in the world. Brazil isn't the only place where being a black man has a multitude of "advantages". Black men can get their "freak" on here in America, too. You just don't hear about it, that's all.
I also dislike the fact that the author believes that black men try to emulate white men, from how they express their sexuality and their preference of women to how they spend their money. He makes mention of this in a few chapters, especially in the one entitled "So, This Is How It Feels to Be a White Man" (a chapter title that I felt was insane). In certain places throughout the world, white men aren't respected, regardless of how they are spoiled and catered to in America. A harsh reality that the author fails to mention is that Americans get no respect overseas, unless you are an "American Minority" or a woman. The reason for this is because people throughout the world are educating themselves on how America was built, as well as George W. Bush's presidency and how it has contaminated other parts of the world.
Brazil is one of the few places where black men and their sexuality is celebrated. Therefore, black men go there to not just have sexual encounters, but to see the world, celebrate life, another culture, themselves and to live a life that they feel they not only deserve, but has been deprived of in America. Some of the men who have been there before claimed that they didn't want to leave and come back home (to America). Some of them go there several times a year. Hell, a few never come back home. For the black men that do come back to America, they come back with an ugly contempt about the U.S., which also includes even more cynical viewpoints of black women and the white power structure. They embrace their options and opportunities to see the world and as a result, they take themselves more seriously and develop a hard-boiled level of self-respect, which includes a list of things they refuse to take from black women and white America. However, this only represents a small percentage of black men, due to the fact that taking these vacations requires a lot of money and time. At the same time, you don't have to work in Corporate America in order to take these trips. I've met guys who work at blue collar jobs (UPS, etc...) who dedicate themselves to seeing the world. Some of them I've met on Carnival cruises. The author states that according to what he has heard black men say, black men are more happier about traveling to Brazil more than they are about the Million Man March (which occurred in 1996; not 1994 as the author states). He feels that this is highly disturbing and sad.
Because of this and other reasons, the author believes that black men are in need of a "makeover". He tells black women that a man has to want to change his lifestyle. And if he doesn't, then it's time to weed him out and other men alike. He also feels that if African-American women are celebrated more in America, there would be no need for black men to travel overseas "looking for love in all the wrong places". He puts part of the blame on Tyler Perry (a.k.a. "Madea"), Martin Lawrence and Eddie Murphy by portraying black women as ugly, overweight and loud as part of comedy routines they do for movies and TV shows such as "Norbit", "Big Momma's House", "House of Payne", etc...
He concludes this book by saying that black women worry so much about their men that they end up having nervous breakdowns, high blood pressure, ulcers and other stress-related illnesses. Regardless of how much Jewel Woods wishes that black men would become more dedicated and devoted to their women (only), a man is going to be a man. The problem is that black women love (and even hate) black men more than they love themselves.
While I am happy that this subject has been touched, it would have been much better if it was done from someone else. Jewel Woods basically got his information from a small group of men who travel to Brazil, uses it against them, making black men look hypersexual, immature and materialistic just to uplift brokenhearted black women and sell books in the process. Don't get me wrong, this isn't as bad as Rajen Persaud writing an outdated book about masculinity issues in the black community and calling it "Why Black Men Love White Women". So, to conclude this review, I will say this... This book is definitely worth reading a time or two. However, I can't recommend it more than that!
 Then Who Do We Blame It On? May 9, 2008
16 out of 17 found this review helpful
Don't Blame it On Rio by Jewel Woods and Karen Hunter is an interview style commentary on why African-American men are choosing to go to Rio, Brazil to find companionship. The general gist of the book is how African-American men are not having their needs met by African-American women and as such they are justified in searching elsewhere. I had read several articles on this so-called phenomenon that gave me a sketch of what to expect when reading this book. I must say that the book was simply a longer version of the articles which have appeared in African-American magazines for the past couple of years.
Don't Blame it On Rio was fairly easy reading, I was able to complete it in less than a day, however, what kept me reading was my desire to find a different story to the age old lack of communication between brothers and sisters. Instead, I found a rehashing of a decades long debate about how most African-American women are simply interested in success and status and are less focused on pleasing their men, particularly sexually. What I found particularly interesting was how some of the interviewees indicated interest in successful, career-minded women but also wanted them to take care of the children and the homefront, while maintaining `freak' status in the bedroom. Much of it read like male fantasy to me which explains why one would spend thousands to travel to a tropical paradise in search of a relationship.
What I found most disheartening was how objectified the Brazilian women were and the lack of clarity on the parts of the men who found the relationships to be anything other than mercenary. In a country filled with poverty and where the sex trade is legal, having sex with wealthy men would seem to be a standard operating procedure. I recommend this book to those who are interested in reading about what goes on in the minds of men who can afford to travel to exotic locales for fantasy fulfillment.
Angelia Menchan
APOOO BookClub
Don't blame it on Rio is a one sided story to why weak minded men travel abroad for sex and companionship May 8, 2008
2 out of 10 found this review helpful
The book explains reasons why black men travel abroad to find sexual exploits and beautiful women. It also states how men feel black women are not worthy of them what the book doesn't explain is why black women have attitudes. Reason 1. Black men are immature 2. Black men are selfish and self absorbed 3. black men sleep around a lot - they offer no security in relationships, in fact most relationships with black men are usually one sided 4. most black men don't respect their mommas let alone another black woman. Black men usually date black women when they are broke and about nothing, as soon as black men become a success they abandon women who stood by them when they were considered nothing and no bodies. Black men are notorious for expecting the ultimate support and loyalty from women but they refuse to be what they expect form women. Black men are not respected by many races and the last thing they should do is disrespect black women. Most black men are so stupid that they that they go abroad marry foreign women and then they get back in the states after those same women from abroad get their green cards , marry and become a citizen and have at least one child to secure their financial future for the next 18 years they dump these dumb losers. I say black women should not be offended. Let those society rejects successful or not go and be others abroad because they are no longer welcomed by me. In fact I am so disgusted by black men I wont even date one anymore
Truth be told black men are weak and I offer them no support
One sided book written by a weak man, read and supported by weak men.
Black women should use black men and take them for all they own because they are worthless and useless. They have never in past or present offered black women any security or loyalty
 Half Right Half Good May 8, 2008
2 out of 3 found this review helpful
I've been going to Rio for vacations starting in 1999. I could relate to some of the experiences of the brothers who go there. But I think,no I know that some of the stories are over blown, yes years ago there were very attractive women at Mia Pataca but over the years the quality has dropped where now the "bottom feeders" are known to frequent there. Actually I don't go to restaurant anymore because its the main tourist trap for American Blackmen. As for the Help Disco, I have been there several times and the men have outnumbered the women 3 to 1 and there would not be a lot of attractive women. Its more the luck of the draw in the current years to find the 10's and 12's as one brother put it in the club. Again years ago I could have very attractive women approach me on the beach where I didn't need to go to the Help or the Termas to find "love".
Another thing Mr. Woods didn't mention of the prices it cost for the company of the women, most guys acted like it was free, noooo these women are working for survival and some support their families in other cities where they are from. Now you might get a "discount" from some of the women if they are really in to you and you see over several trips down there, while I'm on that subject I have learned that some of the women are trying to find happiness in there lives and if you respect them they will open up more to you. Also in my experiences they have asked my opinion on life choices that they are contemplating. I have women I've met over the years who still e-mail me from time to time as far away as Spain that let me know whats going on in there life. On my last trip in March 08' I had a woman that I spent one night with in 2000 come up to me in the Help and greeted me like a long lost friend, actually she had to jog my memory but I did remember her so if you need ego stroking you difinately will find it there. I agree when Mr. Woods stated its not about the sex its about what is hard to find in a mate here in the states.
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